If I hold you here and close to my heart...

I am definitely not feeling fierce. And I might just collapse this week because it's so difficult.

If I sobbed my eyes out...

I'm in a sea of people and I have never felt more alone. And I'm drowning in my sea of people. I feel trapped. I don't know how to get out. I am heading for a breakdown and I can't stop myself. I have tearstained cheeks. Who's to blame? No one. What's to blame? Nothing. THen why? I haven't got a clue. And more importantly, I don't have an answer. What's wrong with me?

If forgetting is to be forgetful, then I don't want to forget anything...

Today... was rather unproductive. However, I'm not caring.

I don't understand.

And also... I'm forgetting. I'm forgetting my memories.

And I don't want to. I really don't.
But I can't stop it.

Come back memories... come back.

If there was another time...

I'm sleepy in the daylight, but I get so sad and awake during late hours. Like now.

What's wrong?
Am I okay?
Will I ever be?
What could possibly be wrong?

I feel like I can't breathe. I feel like I'm in a crowd and no one can hear my whispers and weeps.

If I knew you from before...

Pretty.
That's what I want to hear.
Just once.
For real.

I miss that.